You know, 98% of all men rated themselves as being in the upper half of the population in terms of their listening skills. Huh?! How does THAT math work? Of course, women would be much more accurate in ranking their own listening skills, right? Not!
We hear more about poor listening skills at work than you can imagine. Most people think they are much better listeners than others do. So what’s a big payoff for your perception?
Engaged listening can make you stand out in a very positive way. It makes you stand out because so many people do it poorly! Here’s a slice of how one client increased his impact as a listener:
- Acknowledge the speaker with more slower delivered filler words stretched out longer (e.g., “Ahhh”, “Got it”) so you’re not sitting there silently. The quieter you are, the longer they’ll talk to try to get a reaction from you!
- Show you are interested with your facial expressions. Many people look like they are scowling when they are just concentrating. Avoid impatient nodding or negative head shaking before the speaker has finished.
- Draw others out, ask more questions of them – you get huge credit for wisdom by asking great questions.
- Acknowledge what you heard so people know their comments had an impact. Acknowledge the other person’s point of view thoroughly. You can summarize what you hear them saying in neutral wording … even when you disagree with some or all of what they are saying.
Listening in a more engaged manner can minimize your boredom and give you far more useful information to help you make great decisions. Even though they’re stressed and busy, many people are bored at work. An active conversation can help them and you.