Scott Mautz wrote and article in Inc. Magazine about words parents should use when raising children. Looking at the list, I see the opportunity to also use the list in the workplace. The list in quotes is from Mautz and the comments for each are from me.
- “Your practice is paying off.” Specific feedback about productive behaviors.
- “I don’t know.” Acknowledge what is often true and leads to learning. Vulnerability is OK.
- “Is that really true?” Dealing with facts has many benefits. Unproductive norms and assumptions can be overcome.
- “I’m sorry.” Forgiveness of our self and others is very productive. A sincere apology goes a long way. It demonstrates awareness and opens the door for reconciliation.
- “I hear you.” Being willing to acknowledge another view even when we disagree builds bridges and often opens others to hear a view they initially do not agree with from their perspective.
- “What do you think?” Valuing others thoughts is respectful. It can also provide a new perspective that informs your view of reality.
- “You were right.” Acknowledging someone was right, particularly if you initially disagreed is a sign of maturity and confirmation you are looking for the best answer.
- “I trust you.” Being trusted touches people at a fundamental level. Most people will be incented to maintain your trust. They are also more likely to trust you.
- “I’m sure you can do it.” Overcoming hesitation is a key to progress. It is particularly powerful when it is a new task or responsibility.
- “You decide.” Giving someone the responsibility for a good choice creates a natural ownership and accountability for the decision.
- “I love you.” Scott Peck’s definition of love is that you desire the spiritual growth and well-being of another person. In the workplace, we often do not use the work “love”, but the caring a leader has for others is felt strongly when they demonstrate Peck’s definition of love.
